Childhood should be a time of innocence, exploration, and joy. Unfortunately, for many, it is a time marked by pain, fear, and suffering. One of the hardest forms of trauma to overcome is childhood abuse, especially when the abuser is someone close. Whether physical, emotional, or sexual, childhood abuse leaves deep scars that affect the survivor’s mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being.
I know this pain firsthand. I endured sexual abuse at the hands of my stepfather, someone who should have been a protector. My childhood was stolen from me, and for many years, I was locked in a prison of silence, shame, and fear. But over time, I learned that silence only feeds the trauma. Breaking free meant finding my voice and reclaiming the power that abuse had taken from me. This is the story of how I broke the silence, and how others can do the same.
The Weight of Silence
For many survivors of childhood abuse, silence becomes a coping mechanism. We may feel ashamed, as though the abuse was somehow our fault. We fear judgment, blame, or even disbelief from others. We might stay silent to protect our families or because our abusers have instilled fear in us. That silence, however, becomes a heavy burden, trapping us in the trauma long after the abuse has ended.
For years, I carried the weight of my silence, feeling isolated in my pain. Every time I wanted to speak, I feared the consequences: “Will they believe me?” “Will they blame me?” “Will it tear my family apart?” These fears are valid and real, but the cost of staying silent is even greater. In silence, trauma festers, turning into anxiety, depression, mistrust, and even self-loathing.
It wasn’t until years later, that I realized I couldn’t keep holding onto the pain in silence. I understood that my silence was killing me emotionally and spiritually. I knew I had to break free.
And I know you can too!
I encourage you to take that first step. Speak up, reach out, and begin your journey toward healing. The silence may have been your safety net, but it’s time to let it go and step into the fullness of your life. As someone who has been there, I can promise you—it’s worth it. Victory awaits on the other side of the silence.
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I am LaWanda Will B LaWanda because everyone else is already taken!
Photo by Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash